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Love songs are everywhere. But does anyone have a definition of love, which — people claim — makes the world go around? Sure, it’s easy to tell when you’re in love with someone. [The heart pounds and you act like an idiot.] But it’s much harder to say if you actually love someone.
Enter the mind of Harry Jenkins, as he is about to make love to Natasha,
And then he laughed at himself as he sank beneath the covers. No sane man would question such free and voluptuous pleasure, as if it could only be valued through thought. Only an idiot or a fool would try to analyze love and passion
Nonetheless, like the fool, I seek a definition. Perhaps it is the lawyer in me. On the subject of love, Carl Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist, is a sobering read. All of us, supposedly, carry within us, an animus [if you’re female] and an anima [if you’re male], which is the idealized image of the person you love. And so, when you are in love you are projecting this idealized image on a real, live person who might be naturally quite entitled to be different.
After the honeymoon, those annoying little cracks in the image appear, which could certainly explain the high divorce rate. When you find the real person doesn’t exactly match your superimposed ideal, what do you do?
All of these thoughts led me to explore people’s ideas of all kinds of love, not just the romantic variety, in Final Paradox, the second in The Osgoode Trilogy.
Harry Jenkins is the lawyer protagonist throughout the trilogy, which contain storylines of murder and fraud. He is in the thrall of the beautiful Natasha. His aging father, who abandoned him as a child, has just asked his forgiveness. Harry can’t seem to find that in his heart. Natasha asks him—
What do you think love is?
He shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s about wanting someone as part of your life. Wanting them always with you.” He looked into her eyes. “Why? What do you think?”
“I think it’s about getting outside yourself and seeing another person’s life from their point of view. At least that’s a start,” Natasha replied.
Harry heard his father’s words. It’s all about you, is it? Would he always be the kid, he wondered?
Another character musing about love is Norma Dinnick — an elderly client of Harry’s who trips back and forth between lucidity and madness. She recollects her stew of feelings for various men.
Going back to her hotel, Norma tried to understand. She knew about affection and caring for Arthur, her husband, who kept her safe from the emptiness. But she did not understand this business of love, which David talked about. She did know that such emotions gave her a sense of power. The sheer lust she experienced in the presence of George made her feel weak and vulnerable.
Norma simply doesn’t understand about love and neither does Bronwyn — another character. An embittered soul, she has married a gay man and on her honeymoon – She wandered the narrow beach of sand and stone where the boats ferried back and forth to the grottos. No Peter. But then she saw him at a distance on the beach walking slowly with a younger man she did not know. Where had they come from? Right from the start, she had known. Of course, the bargain was unspoken but well understood. For money and security, Bronwyn had sacrificed any chance for love.
But in the end, Harry does begin to get it. In bed with the lovely Natasha, he was
…transported outside his own body, he was overcome with the desire to know the dreams, fantasies, and mysteries she held within. He would enter her world with love and understanding and never leave. The awe he felt in her closeness made his breathing slow and deepen in rhythm with hers. He watched his hand reach out of the shadows to smooth the sheet. She was at last in his bed and, fearing a mirage, he dared not wake her. In the past two weeks, his world had been shaken. His mind had become a jumble of colliding, conflicting events and consequences. Now he felt her power to draw his life together. A still peace gently settled over him like a silken web of meaning.
Weight Loss Plans For Women Over 50 Weight loss plans for women over 50 need to take certain factors into account. Setting a new year’s resolution to lose weight is tough for anyone to stick to, which is why it’s so important that you formulate a plan that suits you, your lifestyle, and your current fitness levels. How Will Your Resolution Improve Your Life? Before you even get started, it’s well worth thinking about how your new year’s resolution is going to improve your life. Weight loss plans for women over 50 are a fantastic way to increase energy levels every day, and to give you back more confidence if you feel as though you may have lost it. Not only can toning up make you feel better about the way you look but simply being active will give you a new outlook on life. As we get older, fat starts to replace muscle which, in turn, lowers our metabolism. What this effectively means is that we will start to put on weight more easily, even if we maintain the diet and activity levels that we’ve always had. This is why making a new year’s fitness goal can be beneficial in more ways than one! Knowing Where To Start Before you begin it’s always recommended that you see your doctor about any current health issues or concerns that may affect your goal to lose weight in the new year. They will also help to give you advice on a program that is realistic and healthy. You want to make sure that your goals are attainable. Due to the world of crash celebrity dieting, many of us have come to expect results in a short space of time. This is rarely ever the case, and using these systems is the best way to set yourself up for failure. Instead, you need long-term strategies that keep you motivated as you go along. Get Going! Weight loss plans for women over 50 are similar to plans for any other age group you need to increase the levels of physical activity at the same time as watching your diet. When it comes to losing weight, you ultimately need to take in fewer calories than you are using up every day. During the perimenopause stage, it’s also important to consider certain types of exercises. For example, weight-bearing exercises are a very important way of increasing bone density, reducing the risk of osteoporosis in later life. On top of this, weight-bearing exercises are also a great way to raise your metabolism by building more muscle on the body. Weight loss plans for women over the age of 50 don’t need to be complicated – they simply need to be attainable, healthy and gradual.
Communicating with someone who is suffering from depression can be challenging, as it can be difficult to know what to say or how to act. However, it is important to remember that your words and actions can have a significant impact on their mental health and well-being. Here are some tips for communicating with someone who is struggling with depression:
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Listen without judgment: Let them express their feelings and emotions without interrupting or dismissing them. Show empathy and understanding, and avoid criticizing or judging their thoughts and actions.
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Offer support: Let them know that you are there for them and that they are not alone. Offer to help them in any way that you can, whether it be through listening, providing practical support, or accompanying them to therapy appointments.
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Avoid giving advice: While it may be tempting to offer solutions or advice, it is important to recognize that depression is a complex condition that requires professional help. Instead, encourage them to seek support from a healthcare professional.
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Be patient: Recovery from depression takes time, and it is important to be patient and understanding. Avoid pressuring them to "snap out of it" or rushing their recovery process.
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Practice self-care: Supporting someone with depression can be emotionally taxing, so it is important to take care of your own mental health as well. Set boundaries, seek support from others, and prioritize your own self-care.
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Validate their feelings: Depression can be a lonely and isolating experience, so it is important to validate their feelings and let them know that it is okay to feel the way they do. Encourage them to express their emotions and offer reassurance that their feelings are valid and important.
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Encourage healthy habits: While it may not cure depression, maintaining healthy habits such as regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep can help improve mental health and well-being. Encourage them to engage in these habits and offer to participate with them if possible.
In summary, communicating with someone who is struggling with depression requires patience, empathy, and understanding. By listening without judgment, offering support, avoiding giving advice, being patient, practicing self-care, validating their feelings, and encouraging healthy habits, you can help support them through their recovery process.
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